


I'll Try Harder Next Time.

by IshidaKun



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Self-Hatred, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-27
Updated: 2018-06-27
Packaged: 2019-05-29 14:13:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 429
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15074873
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IshidaKun/pseuds/IshidaKun
Summary: He could hear the whispers keeping him awake. Telling him how worthless and lonely he was. Usually he would lie to himself, saying that he was ok with how his life had gone so far. He didn't need friends or a lover. They would just complicate things, make him lose focus on his work.





	I'll Try Harder Next Time.

**Author's Note:**

> I blame the Discord I'm in for this trash fire but it still felt good to write. If anyone is interested in joining I'll leave a link at the end.

Richard Perkins lay awake at 2am listening to the sound of rain hitting his bedroom window and thunder booming off in the distance. He’d been drinking heavily before deciding to lay down for the night and realized he was unable to fall asleep.

 

He could hear the whispers keeping him awake. Telling him how worthless and lonely he was. Usually he would lie to himself, saying that he was ok with how his life had gone so far. He didn't need friends or a lover. They would just complicate things, make him lose focus on his work. 

 

But tonight he couldn't lie to himself. He wasn't sure if it was the alcohol or how tired he had become but he couldn't fight it anymore. He just wanted it to end. “You should end it,” the voice whispered, “No one would miss you if you did.” It was right.

 

Perkins had nothing. He wasn't even close to his family anymore. His eyes were wide open now, feeling the air go heavy in the room. He felt like he was suffocating, his mind a hazy mess of emotions and thoughts. All screaming for his attention.

 

He couldn't do this anymore. Perkins violently threw the covers off himself and quickly scrambled out of bed. He didn't want to waste any time, he knew what he was about to do. 

 

He wanted silence, he wanted punishment, he wanted to hurt.

 

He walked into his kitchen with a purpose, grabbing the largest knife he had. A gun would be quicker, painless. But that's not what was being screamed for.

 

He wanted an end, he wanted pain.

 

Perkins stood in the middle of his kitchen with the knife angled up toward his stomach. He took a few moments to breathe. A tiny voice in the back of his head desperately tried to whisper over the screaming but was left unheard.

 

In the next moment he plunged the knife into his stomach. The pain was almost unbearable, he yelled out but didn't stop. He stabbed himself again and again and again. Until he was on his knees, knife sticking out of his stomach. 

 

He pulled the knife out, blood was everywhere. 

 

He was beginning to regret what he had done but there was no turning back. He moved to lay down on his stomach, he could feel the sticky yet cold tile on his cheek. 

 

His brain was already growing hazy as the blood began to pool underneath him. Perkins closed his eyes.

 

Maybe dying wouldn't be so bad. 

 

He’ll try harder in the next life.

**Author's Note:**

> Our server is called Heavy Thirst and is an 18+ Heavy Rain/DBH server. We mostly latch on to side characters and develop them more than they ever needed to be. It's lots of fun, and you should totally come join. https://discord.gg/HFWSbcr


End file.
